Being Pinned

If someone is on top of you and trying to do something to you that you do not want done, you have several strategies at your disposal. In some cases, the person may be an intimate partner, and your strategy may vary in this instance. 

Let’s start with an intimate partner getting overly aggressive. A violent, guttural “No! Stop doing that!” may suffice to stop the assault. As one would-be rapist reported on Reddit: 

I’m a pretty moral guy. But I think the thing that has always stuck with me…is how close I came to actually doing it. If I hadn’t looked up at her face and seen what she was feeling, I might have continued. In my mind, at the time, she wanted it. 

If yelling at your partner does not stop the assault, you now know that this person is persisting in the face of clear instructions to stop and does not care about you at all, so therefore force is fully justified. 

Another good strategy is to start saying “I can’t breathe” a few times. If the person on top of you has no regard for that, then you have the right to inflict some serious agony on them. If you are truly restrained, then you can go limp and play possum to see if the assault ends or s/he loosens their grip on you. If the person on top of you is not concerned that you appear to no longer be breathing, then you are dealing with someone who is willing to end your life, and you have no choice but to fight as violently as you can, gouging eyes, smashing testicles, and doing anything else to keep yourself alive. 

If it is someone with whom you intended to be intimate getting too aggressive, you can probably also get out of the situation by claiming you have diarrhea and need to go #2 really bad. Grab your clothes on the way and get out! If that does not work, you are dealing with a real sicko and you need to fight like crazy to get him off you.    

If your hands are not restrained, the techniques we learned standing up are useful in ending the assault, particularly the eye gouge. You may also reach down to your assailants’ testicles, grasp one or both of them tightly, and squeeze as hard as you can without letting go.

Importantly, if you do not wish to have anal sex (and therefore, by definition, suffer an anal rape), do not let a man with whom you are being intimate get behind you! It is much harder to defend yourself when someone is on top of you from behind. 

The following video describes one woman’s use of this technique to devastating effect: 

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As the following video illustrates, it does not take much force to incapacitate someone by striking their testicles, but you should still squeeze or strike as hard as you can. 

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